The King of Queens

Mark Seen

Pilot Sep 22, 1998 Doug receives his new big screen TV and turns the basement into a private recreation room. However, after the death of the wife of Carrie's father and the subsequent burning down of his house, Arthur and Carrie's sister Sara move in. So Doug's recreation room becomes Arthur's new room, and the big TV moves to the bedroom.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Fat City Sep 29, 1998 Stunned by an old photograph of Carrie's mother, Doug convinces Carrie to go on a diet and must pretend he is going on one too.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Cello, Goodbye Oct 6, 1998 Carrie's on the fast track at her new job in a Manhattan law firm. But the trappings of success – late nights at the office, free concert tickets and being surrounded by bright, dynamic people – make Doug wonder why she ever ended up with a guy like him. While painfully succumbing to boredom at a cello concert, he discovers that, despite his lowbrow tendencies, Carrie never has and never will feel she "settled" by marrying him.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Richie's Song Oct 13, 1998 Doug can't figure out why Carrie refuses to go on a double date with Richie and his wife, Marie.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Paternal Affairs Oct 20, 1998 Doug and Carrie throw a wedding anniversary party for themselves. Doug invites his aunt, and finds out that his aunt and uncle are having problems. When Arthur meets Doug's aunt, he falls for her. Carrie eventually lets him date her, but ends up regretting it, leaving Arthur with plans to propose to her.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Head First Oct 27, 1998 After feeling bad that Arthur has no friends, Doug starts taking Arthur everywhere with him.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

The Rock Nov 3, 1998 Doug and Carrie remember when he proposed to her after a jeweler offers more money for the ring than Doug had originally paid.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Queasy Rider Sep 21, 1999 Against Carrie's wishes, Doug buys a motorcycle which causes them to have a huge fight; Meanwhile, Arthur gets a job at a pretzel store.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Female Problems Sep 28, 1999 Doug feels left out after Carrie becomes friends with a new neighbor.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Assaulted Nuts Oct 5, 1999 Doug, while goofing off at work, accidentally ends up with a staple wound to the scrotum.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Parent Trapped Oct 12, 1999 Deacon & Kelly ask Doug & Carrie to be the godparents of their baby; Arthur runs into trouble at the pretzel store when he is put in charge.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Tube Steaks Oct 19, 1999 Carrie leaves the garage door open and Doug's big screen TV is stolen.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Doug Out Oct 26, 1999 Arthur's inclusion at an outing to a Mets game creates problems for Doug.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Get Away Nov 2, 1999 Doug and Carrie, along with Deacon and Kelly, go on a weekend trip. While there, they find out that Deacon and Kelly have a very active sex life.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Do Rico Oct 3, 2000 Carrie is turned on by an imitation of Rico done by Doug; Arthur tries to chronicle his own life story.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Roast Chicken Oct 10, 2000 Carrie has Doug sign a congratulatory card for his boss' twenty years at the company and the whole thing blows up in Doug's face. Now, Fisker, the boss, wants Doug to participate in the banquet roast and Doug blames Carrie for this fiasco. He does rise to the occasion, however, and even manages to get some good laughs out of the audience. That is, until he starts to tell some jokes that hit a little too close to home.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Fatty McButterpants Oct 17, 2000 Doug vows to lose 30 pounds.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Class Struggle Oct 24, 2000 Carrie decides to return to college, with very little time to get things done.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Strike One Oct 31, 2000 Doug feels the urge for a new car and against Carrie's advice buys it for himself only to find out moments later that the workers at the IPS company are going on strike. He unsuccessfully tries to return the car, forcing Carrie to work major overtime to compensate for his mistake.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Strike Too Nov 7, 2000 With no end to the IPS workers strike in sight, Doug tries substitute teaching at his sister Stephanie's school.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Strike Out Nov 14, 2000 Doug and Deacon, who are out of work because of a strike, resort to playing sophomoric pranks, along with Arthur, to keep from going stir crazy. But they're driving Carrie and Kelly nuts. Eventually, Doug and Deacon return to work leaving Arthur alone.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Walk, Man Sep 25, 2001 The Heffernans are again thinking about getting pregnant, just four months after Carrie's miscarriage. But there's one problem: Arthur. Now that his last friend from the senior center has moved away, Arthur naps all day. By the time Doug and Carrie get home, Arthur is full of energy and has no one but them to unleash it on. Quality time alone for the couple is impossible. That is, until Doug hires an attractive dog walker to occupy an unsuspecting Arthur: she takes him for a stroll three times a week, under the guise that she's a student interested in learning about his World War II experiences

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Sight Gag Oct 2, 2001 Doug thinks he has come up with the perfect birthday gift for Carrie: laser eye surgery. That is until Carrie ends up nearly blind from the operation.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Mean Streak Oct 9, 2001 As Doug is about to break what was once thought of as an unbeatable record, the tension between he and the guys at IPS mounts. For 18 years, Iggy Stenkowski's record of 951 consecutive perfect delivery days has remained intact, and the guys resent Doug as he's about to beat it and replace the legendary Iggy's plaque with one of his own. As he deals with his internal conflict, Carrie has trouble dealing with the fact that Holly, the dog walker, actually enjoys spending time with Arthur. She starts to wonder if her father really is as great as Holly thinks he is and that maybe she's the problem in their relationship.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Friender Bender Oct 16, 2001 Doug rear-ends Kelly and Deacon's car and he and Carrie insist that they personally pay for the damage so they can leave the insurance company out of it. But, when the Palmers give them an estimate of almost twelve hundred dollars, Doug and Carrie are taken aback, and what started off as a nice evening out with friends turns into two couples complaining about each other's cheapness. Meanwhile, Spence is babysitting Kirby and goes from being the "Spencinator" to the "Scaredinator" once Kirby finds out that he is allergic to peanuts.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

No Retreat Oct 23, 2001 Carrie is invited to her company's retreat for the first time and is overcome with excitement. Doug is not so thrilled, however, when he discovers that he must spend the whole weekend sans TV. While away, Carrie mingles with the other lawyers and partners while Doug stands by very uncomfortably. Doug then tries his best to charm the partners and in his effort ends up in a lie about climbing Mount Everest – much to the delight of Carrie who sees this as an opportunity to advance herself at work. Meanwhile Arthur, all alone at home in Queens, ends up destroying Doug and Carrie's bedroom and begs Deacon to help him hide the damage before they return home.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Ticker Treat Oct 30, 2001 Doug decides to buy a pumpkin to get into the Halloween spirit, but as soon as Arthur sees it, he smashes it and banishes the celebration of Halloween. Doug, frustrated by Arthur "forbidding" things, takes it upon himself to go all out with decorations and ends up scaring Arthur so badly that he nearly has a heart attack and ends up in the hospital. When Doug finds out about Arthur's traumatic childhood and the reasons why he hates Halloween, he feels guilty for what he has done and tries to make it up to him by driving around town, looking for Arthur's favorite childhood treat. Deacon, on the other hand, is determined to find his son Kirby a superhero costume, but is frustrated because there aren't any black superheroes. Deacon resigns himself to the fact that Kirby is gay because he turns down the Darth Vader costume so he can be a Power Puff Girl.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Lyin' Hearted Nov 6, 2001 As Arthur prepares to undergo heart surgery, he asks Carrie and Doug to bring him his sleep mask. While digging through Arthur's closet for the mask, Carrie finds a box which contains an extensive scrapbook of her old finger-paintings, report cards, and school photos that Arthur has been keeping. As she is flipping through it, she finds an acceptance letter from Florida State University – which she has never seen before. Meanwhile, Doug makes friends with a quirky stranger in the hospital and soon regrets it.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Arthur, Spooner Sep 24, 2002 Carrie has been put in charge of overseeing a group of people who will be organizing and distributing legal documents for one of her firm's big cases. The catch is that her team will have to work the night shift, and they're "not the sharpest tools in the shed." Doug is disappointed by her new appointment because this means that they won't be spending any time together, but then decides to use her time away as an opportunity to do whatever he wants – eat in bed, not brush his teeth before he goes to sleep, etc. Unfortunately, he starts to get a little lonely but soon discovers that Arthur makes a suitable companion to keep him company.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Window Pain Oct 1, 2002 Mike and Debi, a bright young couple, move in next door to Doug and Carrie. The Heffernans don't make the greatest first impression as an argument they're having can be heard throughout the neighborhood. Carrie feels that her job, as a legal secretary, and Doug's, as a truck driver, are insignificant next to her neighbors, who both hold professional jobs. She tries desperately to make a good impression on her new neighbors by inviting them over for dinner, but Doug thwarts her plan. Meanwhile, Arthur takes advantage of Spence's job at the subway by insisting on free rides.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Holy Mackerel Oct 8, 2002 Doug and Carrie run into Father McAndrew at the fish market. They exchange pleasantries and as they are parting ways, Father McAndrew tells them that he would love to see them in church sometime. Unsure of how to decline politely, the Heffernans instead agree to attend Sunday's services. During the service, Carrie reflects on the one thing that she really needs help with – a raise. Miraculously, the following day, Carrie receives word that her prayers have been answered and that she is getting her raise. Much to Doug's dismay, Carrie's prayers turn to more frivolous things – like shoe sales. He does his best to convince her that God would never approve of her prayers, but soon enough Carrie catches Doug praying for the Jets to win their latest football game. Meanwhile, Arthur hosts an open house in order to sell the house. Unfortunately, he hasn't mentioned a word of his efforts to Doug or Carrie, the homeowners.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Kirbed Enthusiasm Oct 15, 2002 Deacon asks Doug to help him coach his 8-year-old son's football team and the boy challenges Doug to try out for a semi-pro team, but Carrie isn't thrilled with the idea until she sees an interesting photo of him.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Mammary Lane Oct 22, 2002 Doug's bowling team prepares for a tournament, while Carrie agrees to babysit Mr. Kaplan's son, in hopes of furthering her career. But when Doug throws out a mercy flirt and Carrie runs into an awkward set of hands, all goes downhill.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Business Affairs Oct 29, 2002 Doug stops by Carrie's office, and is introduced to her work-husband Curt. Although Carrie assures him that he has nothing to worry about since Curt is gay, Doug is threatened by just how close the two are. They go to lunch together, share work secrets, and are very tight. He raises his concerns to Carrie, but she tells him that he has the same relationship with Deacon. Doug is not happy with her comparison, and the two than try to make each other jealous by spending more time with their "work spouses" than with each other. Meanwhile, Arthur is jealous of a new dog that Holly has added to her route.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Flame Resistant Nov 5, 2002 Doug and Carrie run into Doug's high school girlfriend, Margie, at his favorite sports bar. Carrie gets jealous when she discovers that Doug's mother would rather spend time with his ex-girlfriend than her. Margie and Doug fight over the song that Doug was meant to write for her back in high school. Doug, intent on redeeming himself attempts to write the song with help from Danny.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Doug Less (1) Oct 2, 2003 The sixth season opens with a newly svelte Doug and a surprisingly jealous Carrie, who just can't hide her disdain when people constantly compliment her hubby on his weight loss. Doug decides to suprise her by taking her to an old holiday spot of theirs.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Doug Less (2) Oct 2, 2003 Doug surprises Carrie with a romantic weekend away at a resort. Doug and Carrie try to get over an argument they've been having, but only make things worse. Deacon finds Spence and Danny in bed together. Arthur decides he is in an emergency situation.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

King Pong Oct 9, 2003 When Arthur handily beats Doug in several games of ping-pong, Doug decides to test his skills on Carrie, but is humiliated when he loses once again. In a desperate attempt to keep his ego intact, he asks Arthur to train him so that he can beat his wife. Meanwhile, Spence's girlfriend, Denise, gets promoted to waitress at the bowling alley, but Spence becomes jealous of the flirting she must do to get tips.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Dreading Vows Oct 16, 2003 During a romantic dinner, Doug is inspired to proclaim his love to Carrie. Carrie is taken by his gesture and suggests that they renew their vows. The two find that planning the wedding is much more troublesome than expected. The ceremony is on again, off again as Doug and Carrie are faced with endless complications, including finding a chimp to serve as Doug's best man. In the midst of the wedding planning Arthur is praying that his wedding present, aged Port wine, will go unused when he discovers the value of the fine wine on E-bay.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Nocturnal Omission Oct 23, 2003 When Doug hears from Carrie that Deacon's ex-wife wants to reunite with him after a two-year separation, he can't decide whether or not to give Deacon the heads-up. When Deacon informs Doug that he just met a beautiful stewardess and is spending the entire weekend with her, Doug decides not to tell him about his ex-wife's plans to reunite with him. But when Carrie discovers this, she demands that Doug tell Deacon so he doesn't ruin his chances of getting back with Kelly.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Affidavit Justice Oct 30, 2003 When the partners of Carrie's law firm notice Doug's softball skills, they ask him to pretend that he's a lawyer in order to play on their company team. Carrie worries that Doug won't be able to pull off being a lawyer, but he is so convincing, an opposing firm offers him a job. Meanwhile, after tracing his ancestry, Arthur believes his great-grandfather was a slave owner and makes it his own personal mission to correct things with Deacon on his ancestor's behalf.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Secret Garden Nov 13, 2003 Carrie fears that her new gynecologist will drop her as a patient after she recommends Danny do some landscaping for him and Danny overcharges the doctor for the work.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Lost Vegas Oct 28, 2004 In an attempt to go to Las Vegas for a weekend with the guys, Doug begins to build up credit by taking Carrie to a spa. Meanwhile, after hearing about Las Vegas, Arthur trains Spence on how to count cards, before visiting a small casino, being held for orphans.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Dugan Groupie Nov 4, 2004 Carrie and Doug have a conflict of interest when Carrie begins to stay late every night at work but it leaves Doug to feel neglected.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Furious Gorge Nov 11, 2004 On the way to a overeating support group, Doug notices an abusive relationship group, and decides to join them instead. Although, Carrie becomes suspicious when he not only gains weight, but begins to cower in her presence.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Entertainment Weakly Nov 25, 2004 Doug's position as the "Funny Guy" is threatened, when IPS' new employee wins over the workforce with his impersonations. Meanwhile, an assistant is hired to work for Carrie, and ends up performing more work than expected.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Name Dropper Dec 2, 2004 Doug digs a deeper hole for himself when he fakes a heart attack to avoid angering Carrie for not knowing her friend's name.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Offtrack... Bedding Dec 9, 2004 Doug's parents pay a visit to the Heffernan household, where Doug surprises them with theater tickets. However, Joe Heffernan is distracted by his Train Fair, which causes Janet to develop a friendship with Arthur.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Silent Mite Dec 16, 2004 While Christmas shopping at the mall, Doug loses his wallet and begins a quest to find the wallet and the culprit who may have stolen it. But with no help from Carrie or the cops, he requests the help of Arthur.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Pole Lox Sep 20, 2005 Doug convinces Carrie to take pole dancing lessons, but is disappointed when she puts on a show for him. Meanwhile, Arthur worries her new hobby is a result of his poor parenting, and smothers her in effort to make up lost time.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Vocal Discord Sep 27, 2005 When Doug and Carrie accidentally get a transcription of one of their arguments, they decide marriage counseling might not be a bad idea. And when Arthur gets hold of it, their argument becomes entertainment for a senior citizens' group.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Consummate Professional Oct 4, 2005 Carrie finds out that while dating, Doug lied about getting a job to get her to sleep with him.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Like Hell Oct 11, 2005 Doug and Carrie both have feelings of not being entirely popular at their workplaces, and both overcompensate to rectify the situation

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Sandwiched Out Oct 18, 2005 A sandwich named for Deacon at Coopers ruffles Doug's feathers. Meanwhile, Carrie schemes to prevent Holly from moving to Manhattan.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Shear Torture Oct 25, 2005 Doug's frequent hair salon visits make Carrie suspicious. Meanwhile, Spence has his own adventures en route to a sci-fi convention.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Inn Escapable Nov 8, 2005 A trip to a bed & breakfast becomes more than Doug and Carrie can handle. Meanwhile, Arthur has a romantic dilemma of his own.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Mama Cast Dec 7, 2006 Doug decides to spend the Heffernans' tax refund on an ice cream truck. Meanwhile, Carrie fills in as a pretend mom at model homes, and discovers a reemergence of her maternal desires.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Affair Trade Dec 7, 2006 Doug panics when he starts getting sexy phone messages meant for another Doug Heffernan, but Carrie doesn't seem to care.Meanwhile, Danny tries to force a wedge between Spence and a new lady friend.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Moxie Moron Dec 14, 2006 Doug and Deacon fill in for Supervisor O'Boyle at the IPS depot. Carrie regrets her decision to complain about her company's chinzy gift for work on an important project.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Major Disturbance Dec 14, 2006 The Palmers' vacation plans are ruined when Doug frightens Major so much that he refuses to be babysat by the Heffernans. In the meantime, Arthur begins hiring out himself and friends from the senior center to ride with solo drivers so they can use car-pool lanes.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Ruff Goin' Dec 21, 2006 Feeling hurt over not being invited to a block party, Doug adopts a dog just to prove to the neighbors that he's an okay guy-a decision he soon regrets. Meanwhile, Arthur falls prey to the gambling bug when trying to help Danny beat it.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Brace Yourself Jan 4, 2007 An unflattering picture by Major prompts Arthur to ask Doug and Carrie for braces. Meanwhile, Kelly hires an out-of-work Spence to help out around the house.

Mark Seen

Seen All To Here

Home Cheapo Apr 10, 2007 Carrie is convinced that Deacon and Kelly were only able to afford a vacation home by being cheap. Meanwhile, Arthur tries to help Spence get a new job.