Duckman Season 4
S04 E01Jan 4, 1997
Dammit, Hollywood Jan 4, 1997 Annoyed with the current state of the film industry, Duckman goes to Hollywood to demand his $7 back. Instead, he falls into the plot of a soon-to-be deposed studio executive, a man who's looking for a patsy to run the studio into the ground in hopes of saving his own job. Duckman becomes head of Paradox Pictures, where ""if it's a good movie its a Paradox"". He quickly begins running through the studio's money, signs a secretary to a 340 million dollar deal to star in a movie in her underpants. The deposed executive also arranges it so that Duckman manages to alienate the studio's three biggest action stars.
S04 E02Jan 11, 1997
Coolio Runnings Jan 11, 1997 With the Father & Son Games coming up, Duckman looks for an alternative to competing with Ajax. He spots a more than adequate replacement in recording artist Coolio, who's returned to school to replace his high school diploma. Coolio does not compete with Duckman. Ajax competes with Duckman and even tho they don't win, it has made Duckman and Ajax's bond stronger.
S04 E03Jan 18, 1997
Aged Heat 2: Women in Heat Jan 18, 1997 Duckman is imprisoned for killing Fluffy and Uranus, again. However, he is accidentally sent to a women's prison. A dream of his comes true! In fact Duckman fits in quite well and becomes the star attraction in the warden's side business, a dance ring. Everything's going great until Suzy comes along.
S04 E04Jan 25, 1997
All About Elliott Jan 25, 1997 Duckman and Cornfed hire a college intern for the agency. The intern undermines Cornfed's reputation and indulges Duckman's self-destructive behavior. Duckman must choose between his flashy new assistant (who may be trying to kill him) and his old partner.
S04 E05Feb 1, 1997
From Brad to Worse Feb 1, 1997 Duckman finds an old high school classmate who's been homeless due to something Duckman did to him 20 years ago. Duckman's attempts to help only make things worse.
S04 E06Feb 8, 1997
Bonfire of the Panties Feb 8, 1997 Cornfed along with Charles and Mambo prepare the ultimate aphrodisiac for Duckman to turn his love life around. They give him a limited amount of the potion, but he quickly replicates it in huge batches. Now he has more woman than he can deal with. Bernice discovers what is going on and demands that he stop. When the real thing occurs between Duckman and actress Courtney Thorne-Smith, no one believes him.
S04 E07Feb 15, 1997
Role With It Feb 15, 1997 Duckman takes the family and the staff on a holiday to a real Indian reservation, with a casino. While there, a psychiatrist notices Duckman and the rest of the family's overall self-destructive behavior. She offers them treatment that involves a role-playing session that uncovers some of their real issues.
S04 E08Feb 22, 1997
Ajax and Ajaxer Feb 22, 1997 Duckman and Cornfed are hired to perform surveillance on a laboratory that is performing experiments on intelligence formulas. Cornfed accidentally swallows a ""Get Dumb"" formula, that falls in with the plans of the scientist who created it. If Cornfed gets cured, will Ajax lose his first true friend?
S04 E09Mar 1, 1997
With Friends Like These Mar 1, 1997 Duckman quests for friendship when Cornfed is the only guest at his surprise party. He begins hanging out at a coffee shop that is filled with a group of twenty-somethings named Ditzi, Bobby, Sassy, Pete and Marion. Together they discuss their ""problems"" a la Friends with a side of Ellen.
S04 E10Mar 8, 1997
A Trophied Duck Mar 8, 1997 Duckman and the gang travel to San Francisco to attend Dickcon 97. He thinks he is being honored with an ""achievement"" award. When he gets there, he encounters an old rival from detective school. The rival is running the event and takes every opportunity to humiliate him. One of these methods involves an attempt to find a kidnapped Cornfed.
S04 E11Mar 15, 1997
A Star is Abhorred Mar 15, 1997 Duckman takes the family and Cornfed out for dinner. The karaoke machine comes out and Bernice's rantings against Duckman are heard by a record company big-wig. He markets her as an Alanis Morrisette type of singing sensation; however, the tour takes a toll on her and the family.
S04 E12Mar 22, 1997
Bev Takes a Holiday Mar 22, 1997 Bernice travels to Washington to assume her new role as Congresswoman. Duckman spots a woman who happens to look like Beatrice, but gets hit by a bus. It turns out that she is Beatrice and Bernice's long lost triplet. Bev realizes the only way to keep Duckman alive is to pretend to be Beatrice.
S04 E13Apr 12, 1997
Love! Anger! Kvetching! (a.k.a. Ain't Gonna Be No Mo No Mo') Apr 12, 1997 Duckman plans a big poker for the evening. Unfortunately before the game his obnoxious Uncle Mo arrives and claims he is dying. To avoid the curse that befell his cousin, Duckman tries to wait on him hand and foot. Just how much of his Uncle can he take?
S04 E14Apr 19, 1997
Duckman and Cornfed in 'Haunted Society Plumbers' Apr 19, 1997 Duckman and Cornfed become plumbers and their first job takes them to a society gathering in a mansion. While not doing his job, Duckman discovers that the cursed ""Sharon Stone"" is missing; he and Cornfed try to recover the diamond before the hostess discovers the theft. After the diamond is revealed to be missing, its curse comes into play and traps them in the mansion.
S04 E15Apr 26, 1997
Ebony, Baby Apr 26, 1997 Cornfed leaves for a much-needed vacation. While he is away, Duckman becomes mesmerized by a black model/private eye who quickly gets him involved in a world of murder, power, lust and every black exploitation clichÃ© that exists with a side of a Spelling/Goldberg production.
S04 E16May 3, 1997
Vuuck, as in Duck May 3, 1997 Duckman inherits a minor league baseball team as the dying wish of the owner who is trying to keep the team from hands of a banker. To boost attendance he stages a series of stunts, that humiliate and scare the players into quitting. He ""hires"" nine super-models to take their place and they are an instant success. Cornfed teaches them the fundamentals of baseball and they become a great team. The banker institutes a scheme to prevent the supermodels from winning the big game and Cornfed discovers his other scheme on the Internet in the newsgroup alt.villians.greedy-schemes.
S04 E17May 10, 1997
Crime, Punishment, War, Peace, and the Idiot May 10, 1997 Beverly asks Bernice if she knows anything about Grandma-ma's past. The coma-bound Grandma-ma recalls her past in a series of flashbacks that involves a tortured romance with two characters who look and sound a lot like Cornfed (Petrov) and Duckman (Trigorin) with Russian accents.
S04 E18May 24, 1997
Kidney, Popsicle, and Nuts May 24, 1997 Duckman needs a new kidney. To get one requires a donation from a blood relative. He searches for his father, who he thought was cryogenically frozen. Instead he discovers that the man he thought was his father, wasn't. Using the power of the Microsoft Network (Blatant Plug!), the twins and Cornfed find where dad is currently living. Duckman and Cornfed travel there, only to find that his is a paranoid schizophrenic who's formed his own country.
S04 E19Jun 14, 1997
The Tami Show Jun 14, 1997 Duckman backs his car into a cute girl in front the house. Finding out that she is on her own, Beverly and the family invite her to stay; however, Beverly becomes the victim when Tami tries to takeover a have a ""perfect family.""
S04 E20Jun 21, 1997
My Feral Lady Jun 21, 1997 Duckman purchases a mail-order bride, from Tetzloff; however, she's really a jungle savage. With Cornfed's help, they attempt to civilize her a'la My Fair Lady. He asks for her hand in marriage on a ""Surprise Proposals"" episode of Leeza and things go awry when the flashbulbs go off.
S04 E21Jun 28, 1997
Westward, No! Jun 28, 1997 Cornfed invites Beverly to join him on a trip to his Aunt's catfish ranch. Duckman, jealous of Cornfed's interest in Bev, tags along for the ride. After getting the ranch hands fired, Duckman and the gang must help the foreman, Big Jack McBastard, on the big catfish drive to Texas. On part of their drive involves crossing ""Hell's Toilet,"" where ""the days are so hot they can boil your brain and the nights are colder than David Caruso's film career."" After Duckman accidentally kills Big Jack, they are on their own.
S04 E22Jul 12, 1997
Short, Plush and Deadly Jul 12, 1997 The family goes on a dream holiday camping trip. At the park, they run into Fluffy and Uranus who are also on holiday. However, Duckman quickly puts them to work and gets himself banished from the campground. He takes Fluffy, Uranus and Cornfed with him off into the woods, but bees sting the accompanying trio. Cornfed's head swells and an allergic reaction causes Fluffy and Uranus to grow to gigantic proportions and become homicidal. Hearing Duckman's screams, Beverly and a reluctant Bernice go to the rescue leaving entertainer Jim Bailey keeps the boys and Grandma-ma entertained.
S04 E23Jul 19, 1997
How to Suck in Business Without Really Trying Jul 19, 1997 Duckman sells his identity to the Variecom corporation for $1000, which he immediately spends. Unable to use his own name or image, he is left penniless. He even tries to become a Duckman impersonator, until he is ""downsized."" Then he conceives a plan to get his self-respect and identity back. Meanwhile, Cornfed leaves to rejoin the 80's band A Flock of Seagulls.
S04 E24Jul 26, 1997
You've Come a Wrong Way, Baby Jul 26, 1997 Mambo is caught with a cigarette in his mouth; Bernice takes action in Congress. A tobacco company CEO invites her and the family to enjoy the hospitality of the tobacco industry. When Bernice won't change her position, they are put to work picking tobacco. Rescue seems hopeless, until Agnes Delrooney, reveals that she has been hiding out as Grandma-ma all this time. She makes an escape, with Duckman handcuffed to her.
S04 E25Aug 2, 1997
Hamlet 2: This Time It's Personal Aug 2, 1997 Cornfed undergoes analysis and relates this tale about Duckman seeing the ghost of his uncle who says that Duckman's father was murdered by King Chicken. Duckman hangs with Bernice and King Chicken while pretending to be crazy. Cornfed realizes that Duckman is living out the plot of ""Hamlet,"" that will eventually lead to Duckman's death.
S04 E26Aug 16, 1997
Das Sub (a.k.a. Class Warfare) Aug 16, 1997 Convicted of fraud, Duckman is sentenced to 5,000 hours of community service. He is sent to a dangerous inner-city high school, located a half a block from his house, where he becomes a substitute teacher and it turns out that his is the most ""Dangerous Mind.""
S04 E27Aug 23, 1997
Where No Duckman Has Gone Before Aug 23, 1997 In a send-up of the Paramount franchise, Eric Tiberius Duckman, captain of the starship Enterprise matches wits against the evil Khan Chicken.
S04 E28Sep 6, 1997
Four Weddings Inconceivable Sep 6, 1997 At the wedding of Dr. Ben Stein, a series of emotional epiphanies lead to an amazing set of marriage proposals. King Chicken proposes to Bernice. Cornfed proposes to Beverly. Duckman proposes to his new love, King Chicken's ex Honey. After many arguments between the principles, Duckman says he will make all the arrangements, thereby letting everyone blame him. Despite his arrangements, the ceremony goes off with the appropriate hitches, except that Duckman finds out something that Cornfed forgot to tell him.