Are You Being Served?

Mark Seen

Are You Being Served? Sep 7, 1972 A reorganization within the store forces the staff of the Gentlemens Ready-To-Where Department to share their floor space with the Ladies Department. Mrs. Slocombe, head of the Ladies, and Mr. Grainger, head of the Gents, immediately come to loggerheads over control of the center floor display. Mr. Grainger refuses to take down his trousers and put Mrs. Slocombe's underwear in its place. Undaunted, she goes over his head to Captain Peacock, and then to Mr. Rumbold.

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Dear Sexy Knickers Mar 20, 1973 Mr. Lucas attempts to send Miss Brahms a love letter suggesting an after-work "get it together". Confusion on who sent the letter and to whom it was intended sets the stage for a lot of misunderstanding. There's also the customers to contend with and Mr. Lucas has a devil of a time fitting them into clothing.

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Our Figures Are Slipping Mar 27, 1973 The Department figures have taken a dive and so Mr. Rumbold decides to convene a sales conference amongst the staff. Since the meeting is taking place after hours and off the clock, no one is very motivated to provide any solutions. If something isn't done, someone might lose their job, and that someone is clearly Mr. Lucas.

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Camping In Apr 3, 1973 A transport strike leaves the staff stranded at the store, so Young Mr. Grace offers to let them spend the night on the floor. Tents are set up, but Mr. Lucas has trouble keeping his up. A "campfire" sing along leads to talk of the last World War and the experiences some of them had.

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His and Hers Apr 10, 1973 Mr. Grainger's trousers are missing, along with the central display. The staff learns that the space was freed up for the "His & Hers" fragrance display. Mrs. Slocombe is outraged that they went her to take down her underwear and put perfume there in its place. The glamorous salesgirl causes stirrings in the trouser department. When it's discovered that free stockings and ties are given out with every scent purchase, both departments formulate a plan to oust the intruder.

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Diamonds Are a Man's Best Friend Apr 17, 1973 It's pay day at Grace Brothers and the staff realize that their money just doesn't go very far. An opportunity for a bonus arises when a customer loses a diamond and offers a £100 reward. Greed gets the better of everyone, except Mr. Grainger, and soon they're conspiring behind each others backs. Mr. Mash throws a wrench in the search after he damages a jeweled dress, causing a multitude of "diamonds" within the department.

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The Clock Mar 14, 1974 It's Mr. Grainger's 37th anniversary at Grace Brothers and the Department hosts a celebration dinner for him. It's a time of happiness, and dread, for if he receives a cuckoo clock then it means he's to be retired.

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Cold Comfort Mar 20, 1974 A fuel shortage grips the country and Grace Brothers, so the stores furnaces are shut down for the day. The staff are freezing and soon develop unique ways to keep warm.

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The Think Tank Mar 27, 1974 Sales are falling once again and so Mr. Rumbold calls together a "think tank", a suggestion he "borrowed" from Captain Peacock. The staff decide that a fashion show would be the answer, but when Young Mr. Grace won't cough up the dough to hire proper models, the staff are forced to put on the show themselves.

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Big Brother Apr 3, 1974 There's trouble afoot at Grace Brothers! Someone's been lifting Mrs. Slocombe's skirts and putting their hands in Mr. Grainger's drawers. Shoplifting has struck the store and Mr. Rumbold installs a store detective and a video surveillance system. It goes off track for awhile, as Mr. Rumbold turns into a voyeur and the staff act like they're on television. Ultimately, the staff decide to do in the scheme and prey on Mr. Rumbolds hypochondria to accomplish it.

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Hoorah for the Holidays Apr 10, 1974 The Store's redecoration plans threaten to interfere in the staffs vacations. Everyone is now expected to take the same two weeks off and there's disagreements on how to handle it. Grace Brother's Tour Group Company offers some package deals, but they are far from First Class.

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The Hand Of fate Feb 27, 1975 Mr. Humphries begins displaying his ability to read palms and tell the future. He sees that Captain Peacock will soon be "climbing the ladder and wearing a new hat". Everyone takes this to mean a promotion, especially now that there's a vacancy on the Board of Directors and Mr. Rumbold is in line for it. Captain Peacock expects to take Mr. Rumbold's job. The department staff soon all imagine moving up.

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The Hand of Fate Feb 27, 1975 Mr. Humphries begins displaying his ability to read palms and tell the future. He sees that Captain Peacock will soon be "climbing the ladder and wearing a new hat". Everyone takes this to mean a promotion, especially now that there's a vacancy on the Board of Directors and Mr. Rumbold is in line for it. Captain Peacock expects to take Mr. Rumbold's job. The department staff soon all imagine moving up.

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Coffee Morning Mar 6, 1975 Mr. Grainger is 5 minutes late coming back from his coffee break and this sets in motion a management scheme to monitor all breaks. The staff must sign in and sign out when they leave and return to the department. The department staff revolt and union action is taken

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Up Captain Peacock Mar 13, 1975 Captain Peacock is celebrating his 20th year at Grace Brothers, and while his request for a raise has been turned down, he has been given a key to the Executive Wash Room and the privilige of eating in the Executive Dining Room. He lords this over the department staff and Mr. Grainger decides to make some trouble.

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Cold Store Mar 19, 1975 Illnesses strike the Department, and Mr. Lucas decides to fake his to get the day off. His plan backfires as he is assigned to the Ladies Counter as a sort of "quarantine".

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Wedding Bells Mar 26, 1975 Grace Brothers hosts a week long sales event by selling only German goods. The staff, however, find that the German customers they are getting only want British goods. Captain Peacock objects to the "uniform" he's expected to wear and Mrs. Slocombe gets into the German wines.

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German Week Apr 2, 1975 Naughty sayings on her underwear push Mrs. Slocombe to the brink of giving her notice, but then it's discovered that Old Mr. Grace plans to ask a member of the staff to marry him. When he calls for Mrs. Slocombe, everyone assumes she's the one.

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Shoulder to Shoulder Apr 9, 1975 The Ladies Department is temporarily closed due to refurbishing, so Mrs. Slocombe and Miss Brahms are given counter space over in the Gents. However, the men aren't very happy at having to share their area and do their best to make them unwelcome.

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No Sale Apr 7, 1976 When Mr. Grace decides to open the store early, the staff set out to sabotage the new policy.

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Top Hat and Tails Apr 14, 1976 Mr. Humphries' background as a dance instructor is called upon when the Ladies' and Gents' Wear departments form a team to compete in the inter-store ballroom dancing competition.

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Forward Mr. Grainger Apr 21, 1976 Mr. Grainger is selected to fill in for Mr. Rumbold while he is away; the staff wonder whether they should take advantage of Mr. Grainger's good nature, only to discover to their horror that he doesn't have one when he sacks Mrs. Slocombe.

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Fire Practice Apr 28, 1976 After finding that Grace Brothers' fire precautions leave a lot to be desired, Mr. Harman helps out training the staff in fire preparedness and a fireman gives Mr. Humphries a lift.

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Fifty Years On May 5, 1976 After Mrs. Slocombe starts dropping hints that it's her birthday, the staff calculate that she is 50 and plan an appropriate party.

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Oh What a Tangled Web May 12, 1976 Rumors fly when Captain Peacock gets too friendly with Mr. Rumbold's secretary at the Christmas party, and things get really out-of-hand when it seems they might have spent the night together.

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The Father Christmas Affair Dec 24, 1976 When the mechanical Father Christmas proves that it can't be trusted, Mr. Grace offers a bonus for one of the staff to portray the store Santa. Meanwhile, Mr. Humphries and Mr. Lucas attempt to help Mr. Grainger prepare for a song-and-dance show at an old-folks' home.

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Mrs. Slocombe Expects Feb 25, 1977 The staff have kittens when Mrs. Slocombe announces she's expecting a happy event, but it turns out that it's merely her cat that's pregnant; when she refuses to leave Tiddles unattended, she braves the ire of Captain Peacock by smuggling the cat into the ladies' fitting room.

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A Change Is As Good As a Rest Mar 4, 1977 When Mr. Grace announces that he plans on temporarily reorganizing the departments, the staff are indignant, but find that work can be a lot of fun...if you're working in the toy department.

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Founder's Day Mar 11, 1977 To celebrate Mr. Grace's 80th birthday, the staff organize This is Your Department, a spoof of This is Your Life.

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The Old Order Changes Mar 18, 1977 Young Mr. Grace returns from a trip to the U.S. with a host of new sales techniques that he is eager to implement.

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Take-over Mar 24, 1977 The staff prevent another firm's hostile takeover of Grace Brothers by impersonating the shareholders. Mr. Harman gives a rousing speech, and Grace Brothers is saved.

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Goodbye Mr. Grainger Mar 31, 1977 Mr. Grainger's temper as become extremely short. The staff, in a private meeting with Mr. Rumbold, decide he must go. However, when he wins the lottery, his bad mood vanishes and he makes his peace with the staff and stays on.

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It Pays to Advertise Apr 7, 1977 The staff star in a TV commercial for Grace Brothers, produced by Mr. Humphries. Could Mr. Grace's cheapness be the reason for using his staff in such fashion?

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By Appointment Nov 15, 1978 The staff prepare for a visit by the Queen. The visit is abruptly ended when Mrs. Slocombe accidentally pushes a flower pot out the window, nearly hitting the Royal Couple.

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The Club Nov 22, 1978 Young Mr. Grace invites his workers to form a social club - in a dismal cellar badly in need of decoration. Undeterred, the staff tackle the paint and paper job with vigor.

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"Do You Take This Man?" Nov 29, 1978 Mrs. Slocombe thinks she's finally got her man, a bouzouki player in a Greek restaurant. The staff plan a reception at the store to help keep costs down, and her American uncle plans on giving the happy couple a house. Before they can leave for the church, however, the best man arrives with bad news, forcing Mr. Tebbs to don the garb of a Greek vicar and Mr. Humphries that of the bridegroom.

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Shedding the Load Dec 6, 1978 Sales figures are down; profits are low. Young Mr. Grace is forced to make some economies. The threat of redundancies is looming. Someone is going to have to go - but who is it to be?

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A Bliss Girl Dec 13, 1978 A new display of perfume arrives from Bliss, but there is no Bliss Girl to man the counter. Mrs. Slocombe refuses the position, so Mr. Humphries becomes the Bliss Girl for the day.

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Happy Returns Dec 26, 1978 It is Young Mr. Grace's birthday and there is the traditional free lunch for staff in the canteen. Afterwards, the staff plan a much more festive event for the celebration.

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The Junior Oct 18, 1979 Mr. Goldberg is hired as a junior after having recently run his own small tailoring business. To Captain Peacock's chagrin, the staff learn that Mr. Goldberg had served under the Captain but recalls those army days differently.

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Strong Stuff, This Insurance Oct 25, 1979 The staff must take physicals to get insurance. Listening through the door of Mr. Grace's office, they hear Mr. Harman describing the state of the furniture, which they misunderstand as being the results of their physicals.

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The Apartment Nov 2, 1979 By permission of Mr. Grace, Mrs. Slocombe moves into a display apartment in Grace Brothers, because her new home is occupied by squatters. Due to a transport strike, Mr. Humphries seeks to join her in her new accommodations.

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Mrs. Slocombe, Senior Person Nov 9, 1979 Mrs. Slocombe temporarily takes the place of Mr. Rumbold, who has taken ill . She eats the cream cakes she finds in his office. But she then gets a call from the hospital warning that the ice cream is what made him ill.

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The Hero Nov 16, 1979 Captain Peacock is challenged to a boxing match by a member of another department. He backs out, and Mr. ""Hugger"" Humphries is "" elected"" to take his place in a wrestling match. He loses that match, but Mrs. Slocombe enters the ring and defeats the challenger.

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Anything You Can Do Nov 23, 1979 The standard of the canteen food of Grace Brothers is rapidly going from bad to worse. After confronting the catering workers with their complaints, the staff are told to get on with the food preparation on their own.

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The Agent Nov 30, 1979 Mr. Goldberg runs an agency to get the staff better jobs. After Captain Peacock and Mr. Rumbold become aware of this, Mr. Humphries and Mrs. Slocombe are given raises, and decide to stay with the store.

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Is It Catching? Apr 8, 1981 The staff contract a strange tropical illness, Marine's Disease, from Mr. Humphries. They are quarantined in the basement until the disease is past.

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A Personal Problem Apr 15, 1981 Captain Peacock's wife works at Grace Brothers, as Mr. Rumbold's secretary. He is intensely jealous and is absolutely convinced that the two of them are having an affair.

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Front Page Story Apr 22, 1981 Mr. Humphries is made editor of the new staff magazine. The 1st Floor staff is not pleased with the stories he writes about them causing friction in the relations between floors.

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Sit Out Apr 29, 1981 The staff go on strike after being threatened with a pay cut or being moved to the bargain basement. They stage a protest on the roof which is interrupted by a fire which destroys the basement.

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Heir Apparent May 6, 1981 Old Mr. Grace becomes convinced that Mr. Humphries is his long-lost son. Mrs. Humphries (also played by Mr. Inman) arrives, and shows that she has never had relations with Mr. Grace.

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Closed Circuit May 20, 1981 Grace Brothers has decided to enter the video age and display advertisements on closed circuit television throughout the store. Meanwhile, there is a new face in Menswear.

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The Erotic Dreams of Mrs. Slocombe May 27, 1981 Mrs. Slocombe has dreams in which she and Mr. Humphries become romantically embroiled. When she attempts to turn fantasy into reality, the situation becomes most difficult to handle.

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The Sweet Smell of Success Apr 21, 1983 Mrs. Slocombe sells her home-made perfume. After a misunderstanding, Mrs. Peacock finds Captain Peacock without his pants (perfume had spilled on them) and the ill-fated trousers in the hands of Mr. Rumbold's secretary.

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Conduct Unbecoming Apr 28, 1983 Mr. Humphries is accused of stealing and his distinguished career could end in disgrace. In a trial, he is found guilty and dismissed, but Mr. Harman finds the missing money in the back of the till from which it was supposedly stolen.

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Memories Are Made of This May 5, 1983 When the handsome golf pro from Sports comes to the floor for a demonstration, he accidentally hits Mrs. Slocombe. She then thinks she's a little girl, wrecking havoc on the store as she cavorts around the department.

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Calling All Customers May 12, 1983 The staff perform a play on CB radio to advertise Grace Brothers. The play results in the store being swamped by truck drivers who are driven off by Mr. Humphries and Mrs. Slocombe.

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Monkey Business May 19, 1983 Bad news. Grace Brothers may be bought by the Japanese. The staff take their problems to Number Ten, where they contact President Reagan by the phone. Mrs. Thatcher gets fashion tips from Mr. Humphries.

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Lost and Found May 26, 1983 When Mrs. Slocombe's cat turns up missing, she decides that only Mr. Humphries could take its place.

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Goodbye Mrs. Slocombe Feb 18, 1985 Mrs. Slocombe is forcibly retired from her position. Mr. Humphries and Captain Peacock get her job back, but they are retired in the same manner. They end the show as the cleaner and the lift operator.

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Grounds for Divorce Feb 25, 1985 When Captain Peacock tries to salvage his marriage, he resorts to radical measures to discourage an admirer.

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The Hold Up Mar 4, 1985 When the store is robbed late one night, the staff determine to capture the burglars themselves.

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Gambling Fever Mar 11, 1985 Security cameras are again installed at Grace Brothers, and when the staff bet their bonuses on a horse race, it's up to Mr. Humphries to mime the race to them by closed-circuit.

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The Night Club Mar 18, 1985 When Old Mr. Grace decides to allow the staff to use the store for after-hours money-making, they decide to open a nightclub. However, the advertising campaign has some rather unexpected results.

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Friends and Neighbours Mar 25, 1985 When traveling to and from work becomes difficult, the staff threaten to resign unless they receive a travel allowance. Old Mr. Grace offers them the empty apartments on the top floor as living space, but they soon discover cohabitation isn't what it's cracked up to be.

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The Pop Star Mar 31, 1985 This episode we find Mr. Spooner is about to be discovered by a record company. One problem is that his voice keeps giving out. Mr. Humphries gives him a tonic and he recoveres for a little while. While auditioning on tv with Grace Brothers Staff, his voice gives out.